If you understand this, you’ll stop trying to find yourself.
Because there’s nothing there.
Just awareness.
Just this moment.
Just nothingness, watching itself.
I learned this sitting still.
On the last day of a silent retreat.
No talking.
No books.
No distractions.
Just 5 days of facing the only thing most people run from:
Their own mind.
By day five, I wasn’t “me” anymore.
Not in the usual way.
Not the thought-stream version of me. Not the list of traits. Not the identity I use on social media.
Just a field of perception.
Sound. Breath. Weight. Light.
Then something snapped. Or rather… dissolved.
I stopped being “in my body.”
And I stopped being outside of it too.
I just was.
No edges. No center.
Everything was arising in awareness.
And for the first time, I wasn’t trying to grab it.
No chasing peace.
No fighting discomfort.
Just watching it all pass by like clouds across a cold sky.
The big idea?
There is no “I.”
There never was.
Just awareness, witnessing a pattern it mistook for itself.
Your name, your story, your preferences?
Temporary files.
Stored in RAM.
Delete on reboot.
So what?
Exactly.
That phrase saved me.
The night before, our teacher warned us not to chase an “experience”.
“Whatever happens, happens. Whatever doesn’t, doesn’t. So what?”
I thought it was a throwaway line.
Turns out, it was the deepest thing she said.
Because that’s the only sane response to reality:
So what?
You don’t need to optimize this.
You don’t need to figure out what it means for your morning routine.
You don’t need to add it to Notion or one of those trendy productivity apps.
Just breathe.
And let it go.
The real shift wasn’t the moment of nothingness.
It was what came after.
When I realized I didn’t need to do anything about it.
No integration. No system. No “leveraging the insight.”
Just life.
Back to normal.
Emails. Dishes. Deadlines.
But lighter.
Because I stopped taking the self so seriously.
This isn’t enlightenment.
It’s clarity.
And it’s boring, honestly.
No golden light.
No cosmic download.
Just you.
Still here.
Still breathing.
Still aware.
Here’s the takeaway:
You don’t need more complexity.
You need less identity.
Less mental furniture.
Less noise.
Let it all fall away.
Watch what’s left.
Spoiler: it’s still you.
But quieter.
What next?
Most productivity systems are defense mechanisms.
We try to plan our way out of pain.
We build second brains to avoid first-hand experience.
But the only system that matters is presence.
And that’s where monkwit comes in.
It’s not just a productivity tool. It’s a liberation device.
It helps you be more productive by clearing the clutter.
It reminds you:
Existence is already happening.
You don’t need a strategy to be real.
You just need space.
And a little silence.
And some action.
